Fuck.

Desert Man is pissed. I should not be pissed. I should not give a fuck.

But I talked to a customer on the phone tonight who was unbelievably rude. And he had the gall to accuse me of being condescending and rude. The truth was, I was keeping my composure while he abused me. He said I was inept. And he said that I failed.

I obviously know that is not true. I understand that this is just a bad person. But what pisses me off is that he exists, for one. And two, that I couldn't tell him to go fuck himself forever.

These kinds of people need to be dismissed. They need to be kicked out of polite society. They should not be allowed to abuse hard-working people just because they are paying money.

He may have even had some legitimate concerns - but he was still a complete fuckhead. A complete fuckhead.

The call went like this, basically. Imagine that Fuckhead has a really, sassy effeminate voice. Because he did. I'm just going to use generic terms for what work I'm doing because I don't really want to get lost in specifics.

Desert Man: Hello, how can I help you?
Fuckhead: My name is Fuckhead Dickweed.
Desert Man: Oh, hello, Mr. Dickweed. I called you earlier to give you an update.
Fuckhead: You did?
Desert Man: Yes, sir. I was trying to reach you because I wanted to let you know that we're still working on your case and are trying to make a determination and are awaiting more information.
Fuckhead: Ok, wait a minute. Are you a manager? Because you're just talking and I don't even know who you are.
(At this point I already sensed this was going to be extremely difficult. His tone was unbelievably snarky)
Desert Man: Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Dickweed, I'm a case handler in the case handling department.
Fuckhead: Ok, well, I just want to let you know that this has been very inconvenient for me.
Desert Man: Yes, I apologize that it has been a bit of an ordeal.
Fuckhead: It's been more than a little ordeal, it's been a huge inconvenience. In any case, finish what you were saying.
Desert Man: Yes, well, I was just letting you know I spoke to the man at the place and he said he would send us an update and then we would contact you once we made a determination.
Fuckhead: Get to the point. You're wasting my time.

Jesus. I can barely go on. This guy was a complete fucking asshole. A prick. A total fuckwad.

Desert Man: Sorry, Mr. Dickweed. I'm just trying to explain our process here.
Fuckhead: I don't care. Get to the point.
Desert Man: Ok, so we're just awaiting the determination.
Fuckhead: Ok, that's not any information at all. You're inept. I want to talk to someone else. You've been nothing but dismissive, rude, and condescending.
Desert Man: Ok. let me get a manager.

I put him on hold and he hangs up and calls a coworker who has to deal with him.

AAAAAAAAAGH! Why do these fucking assholes get under my skin? It's because I want to tell them off but I can't. And further, when people abuse me I often find that I think I deserve it. That I have to justify why they were wrong. This happened to me the other day actually - my brother lost it on me and told me, "Fuck you, etc." in a really loud and angry voice. And it was such bullshit. But I spent all this time in my mind and to others trying to justify why he was wrong, that I didn't deserve it. Of course I didn't deserve it! I'm not saying people aren't justified in being angry at me every once and a while, but I have boundaries. People can't yell at me and call me names and say fuck you and call me inept.

This fuckhead who talked to me today - he wants to abuse people who have no power to fight back. Probably because his dad was an asshole to him or his mom. Or his brother. Just like my fucking brother can be a complete asshole to me. I don't have to take that shit. Abusive fucking people. Fuck. Fuck 'em.